M.R. Brooks Scholarship

My mother is a single bisexual veteran. Growing up she had always taught me to be self reliant and that being different is okay. She was deployed to Iraq for a year while I was in elementary school. Her father being a disabled single gay man himself who was also a veteran, they both held a lot of the same values. They are both strong advocates for the LGBTQIA community and believe that everyone has the right to love. They also believe that you do not need to wait for your prince/princess/etc. charming to start living your life authentically. Confidence is something everyone struggles with on one way or another, and they both tried their hardest to make sure that my siblings and myself had it, and to try our best to help others feel the same way. I plan on becoming a child psychiatrist and fostering teenagers once I get settled into my practice. I want to help as many children as I can and show them that it is okay to be different, it is okay to be weird, and it is okay if how you express yourself and experience the world is outside of what society tells them it should be. I have my mother and grandfather to thank for that. I know it will not be easy, it was not easy for me, but I am not going to let that keep me from trying.

My mother was a single mother, who identified as lesbian. I grew up with 4 younger siblings and unfortunately, my mother did not have a stable lesbian relationship. Often there would be women in and out of the house, often ending treacherously after a build-up of anger and childhood trauma making it difficult to properly communicate. Through this, I never realized the struggles socially my mother was experiencing in addition to relationship issues. As a child, I didn’t understand the lack of acceptance of the LGBTQ+ community. I failed to understand why my mother and I were kicked out of a church, why our pride flags would disappear from our yard, and why my mother’s family didn’t speak to her. Through the hate I’ve seen my mother experience, she never failed me as a mother. She absorbed the hatred of so many people, I find it impossible now that she could put a smile on her face. Looking back, my mother being a lesbian made me an amazing human. She taught me that happiness comes before anything else. She taught me to love and accept others for who they are. Most importantly, she taught me unconditional love. She showed me that when you choose happiness and love, the rest will figure itself out. She made her own family, people who have been in her life and mine to the fullest capacity, more than I can say for her biological family. While she only temporarily found love in a woman she married in Chicago before it was legal in Arkansas, she experienced love from so many other people I think that’s how she continued to push herself. Growing up seeing unhealthy lesbian relationships, I often thought that it would negatively impact my ability to love in the future. As an adult, I see now that it is very difficult for young single mothers, especially in the LGBTQ+ community, to find long-term partners because of the commitment it takes to raise kids. My mother made many sacrifices for me and my siblings, including putting aside romantic relationships after her marriage failed. This experience showed me one thing, do not be with those that cannot show unconditional love to the people you love in life. My mother faced adversity, not only from the community she lived in but from her own family. She was kicked out of churches, her house and car vandalized, and her parents banned certain kids from being able to play with hers, however despite experiencing so much hate, she embraced her happiness, and love, and stood for her beliefs. She influenced me to stand up for those who have no one standing on her side. I plan to take those life lessons with me and thoughtfully implement them into every action I take. Currently, my plan for the future is to provide an after-school program for underrepresented children, specifically in the LGBTQ+ community. This program will help marginalized students out of abusive homes, alleviate suicide rates in young LGBTQ+ kids, and create opportunities for them to go to university or trade school and succeed in life despite the hate they may experience. Passing on this unconditional love to generations to come is my ultimate goal for my community.